Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize