Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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