No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
Randomize
