You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Randomize