My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
He sent me a snapchat of him singing wrecking ball. Guess what the wrecking ball was. Hint: he literally came.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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