Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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