Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
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