Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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