I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize