She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
