Someone shit on the floor
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
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