anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
