Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
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