what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
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