Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
How external is "for external use only"?
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize