Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.