dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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