i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
