my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Dude he downed 9 shots of tequila, sang bohemian rhapsody with 3 randoms Wayne's world style, solo'd closing time, chased the hot bartender's dog all the way to main, tackled him, carried him back, hot bar tender hugged AND kissed him, then he does a jumping heel click and leaps into my car through the window. Next rounds free at the yeti. Needless to say your little brother is a tequila god.
Basically.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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