i just had sex bonerless
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize