I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
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But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
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i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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