Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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