wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Randomize
