Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize