It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Randomize
