do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
