Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
