So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
