Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
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