No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
