You just made me feel so damn special
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
Randomize
