I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
My drug dealer just texted me that his kid had a rough sleep and was running late to deliver the ounce to my office. Totes adorbs.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Randomize
