You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Randomize
