hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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