wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize