Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize