Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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