good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
