I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
