The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
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