She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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