No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
