Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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