Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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