3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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