is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Randomize