so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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