she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
it's like heaven, but drunker
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
