A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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