Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
