Its about making memories worth repressing
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Randomize
